Emma

my version of last night.

"this is the most fun i've had all night... oh my gosh, those police lights are bright, maybe i shouldn't be holding a gun..." "come over here with your hands where i can see them. now sit down there on the curb." they pulled zack away cuz they were his guns, then they frisked alan like he was some known gangster who was gonna run, but they didn't really frisk me at all. then the questioning began, "where you shooting at eachother?" "yes sir" "did you break any windows?" "no sir" "did anything break over there?" "not that i'm aware of" "did you hear anything breaking? like glass?" "no sir" "will everyone else tell me the same story?" "yes sir" then they made us all sit there for a while while they talked to us about not playing with airsoft guns in a public place. i don't think any of us were planning on it ever again...

then after they left there was the tears, and the hugs, and the adrienalin that wouldn't go away, and more tears that wouldn't stop coming, and more hugs, and then calming down and realizing that state dinner will actually have an interesting new story this year...

i told stacey we'd be able to look back on this eventually and laugh, thankfully eventually is hurrying up.

wow.... it's been a long while... i am amazed i still have an account! cool!

so much to say.... no time to type it all up... but i did write it out!!! it will be posted soon!

friday night? amazing

saturday night? amazing as well

tonight? donno yet...lol


hannah! i think people will look at the tracks and wonder what the heck happened!!! that was so much fun!

TEN things you wish you could say to TEN different people right now:

1. I'm so sorry
2. get over yourself!
3. i really need you right now
4. i'm sorry i don't understand you and that you don't' understand me
5. make up you mind! before you hurt more people!
6. you understand me far too well
7. we got married WHEN?!lol
8. i'm so glad we talking again!
9. what are you thinking?
10. i wonder what you look like


NINE things about yourself:

1. i love south africa
2. i also love Pippin
3. i love logical problems that can be solved
4. teeth make me feel sick
5. change is my worst nightmare
6. books are my escape from this world
7. chirstmas makes me SOOOO HAPPY!!!!
8. i love to sleep in complete darkness
9. it's possible that i trust people too much

EIGHT ways to win your heart:

1. be
2. the
3. man
4. God
5. made
6. for
7. me
8. ...

SEVEN things that cross your mind a lot:

1. i need sleep
2. i miss emily
3. CHRISTMAS!
4. PIPPIN!
5. where did i put my book?
6. i can't wait till friday
7. most often? south africa!

SIX things you wish you never did:

1. that
2. and that one
3. ummmm maybe that one too
4. perhaps i would hvae been better without doing that
5. not studying history all year
6. yes...

FIVE turn offs:

1. ego larger than talent
2. teasing people unkindly
3. being shorter than me (not hard to avoid...lol)
4. disliking dogs
5. not loving God

FOUR turn ons:

1. Smile, hair, eyes
2. personality (humor)
3. kindness to everyone
4. faith

THREE smilies that describe your life:

1. :D
2. :)
3. ;)

TWO things you want to do before you die:

1. live in africa
2. have a family

ONE confession:

1. my life is an open book... you just have to read between the lines sometimes

it's funny isn't it? how you can tell half the story to one person, and the other half to another person, but they will never meet and so will never get the full story, but at the same time they don't realize taht they only know half the story...


and it's also interesting howmuchi used to be able to tell you.

so... at frys tonight, george got the hiccups...

and that doesn't sound so funny, but everytime he hiccupped, he had his mouth open, or was in the middle of a cough, and the look on his face (the one of abject horror because people might have heard it) caused the ENTIRE woodwind section, and half of the cello section to spend five minutes laughing uncontrollably... Mr. Giffered (Gifferd?) (whatever) realized we weren't paying attention to him, and just looked at us with a confused expression... then george hiccupped again, and everybody who understood why were laughing was laughing to hard to explain it... but when someone finally did Mr. G looked more confused and asked "and your laughing that hard because of THAT?" which of course, made us laugh even more....



my sides hurt from laughing


anyway... that was the highlight of my day, that and having no homework, because the sub didn't give us our reading in history, french teacher decided not to give any, we watched a movie in biology, and ms. cheese's class never has homework until the end of the six weeks... so, to bed before 10:30!

night!

now we can listen to christmas music!!!!



oh, and julia? i can't WAIT till the 25th!!!!

23:04] trav10668: my nwme is david and im 15
[23:04] trav10668: ?r u single
[23:04] trav10668:
[23:04] trav10668: ill take that as a yes
[23:04] pippincrazy101: i'm emma.... um, no
[23:04] trav10668: *wink wink*
[23:04] trav10668: r u single??
[23:04] trav10668: cause
[23:04] trav10668: okay
[23:04] pippincrazy101: no, and i'm older than you
[23:04] trav10668: he needs to be done
[23:04] trav10668: ....
[23:04] trav10668: im back
[23:04] pippincrazy101: yay!
[23:04] trav10668: o
[23:05] pippincrazy101: lol
[23:05] trav10668: and?
[23:05] trav10668: love does not repuire an age lmit
[23:05] pippincrazy101: right, but maturity level helps
[23:05] trav10668: well thats good cause i am mature
[23:05] pippincrazy101: oh
[23:05] trav10668: ....
[23:05] pippincrazy101: are you a freshman?
[23:05] trav10668: so...
[23:05] trav10668: no
[23:05] trav10668: im a soph more
[23:05] trav10668: yeeah
[23:05] pippincrazy101: right.... still young
[23:05] pippincrazy101: lol
[23:05] pippincrazy101: where are you from?
[23:05] trav10668: nu uh!
[23:06] trav10668: TEXAS
[23:06] pippincrazy101: i've been there
[23:06] trav10668: thats cool
[23:06] trav10668: maybe youve seen me
[23:06] pippincrazy101: doubtful
[23:07] pippincrazy101: so
[23:07] trav10668: i think so
[23:07] pippincrazy101: think what?
[23:07] pippincrazy101: huh?
[23:07] trav10668: what?
[23:07] trav10668: i didnt say anything
[23:07] pippincrazy101: you said i think so...
[23:07] pippincrazy101: ?
[23:08] trav10668: i did?
[23:08] trav10668: strange...
[23:08] trav10668: SNAP WHO DAT
[23:08] trav10668: wait nvm
[23:08] trav10668: WAIT

[23:08] trav10668: oh
[23:08] trav10668: haha
[23:08] pippincrazy101: your talking to yourself?
[23:08] trav10668: NO

[23:08] trav10668: ..
[23:08] trav10668: im talking to you
[23:08] pippincrazy101: oh
[23:08] pippincrazy101: oka
[23:08] pippincrazy101: y
[23:08] trav10668: dur
[23:08] trav10668: y am i talking to you?
[23:09] pippincrazy101: cuz you stole the keyboard from travis?
[23:09] trav10668: NO
[23:09] trav10668: i fought him to the death in a fencing match and i came out victorious
[23:09] pippincrazy101: oooo fencing!
[23:09] trav10668: so HA
[23:09] trav10668: yup yup
[23:09] pippincrazy101: wait, you KILLED HIM!?!??!
[23:09] trav10668: Ya..it was a necassary loss
[23:09] trav10668: YOU LIKE HIM!!
[23:09] trav10668: OOOOOOOOO
[23:09] trav10668: love love lovey love
[23:09] pippincrazy101: um
[23:09] pippincrazy101: no?
[23:10] pippincrazy101: and that's mature
[23:10] trav10668: <3 <3 <3
[23:10] trav10668: YOUr MATURE

[23:10] pippincrazy101: dude, you were the one asking me if i was single
[23:10] trav10668: you should confess your love for travis
[23:10] pippincrazy101: but i dno't have any
[23:10] trav10668: thats true
[23:10] trav10668: and yet......
[23:10] trav10668: YOU LIKE TRAVIS

[23:10] trav10668: im gunna tell him!!
[23:10] pippincrazy101: suer... whatever
[23:11] trav10668: will you go out wth him
[23:11] pippincrazy101: no
[23:11] pippincrazy101: i have a boyfriend
[23:11] trav10668: cheat on him
[23:11] pippincrazy101: hence the NOT SINGLE
[23:11] pippincrazy101: mature
[23:11] trav10668: theresa a song about it
[23:11] trav10668: travis is better
[23:11] trav10668: trust me
[23:11] trav10668: hes related to me
[23:11] pippincrazy101: that makes him SOOO much better
[23:11] trav10668: yup yup
[23:11] trav10668: he has my blood
[23:11] trav10668: ...literally
[23:11] pippincrazy101: but he's older than you
[23:12] pippincrazy101: so you have his blood
[23:12] trav10668: and????
[23:12] trav10668: no....
[23:12] trav10668: he was create din a lab
[23:12] trav10668: in a testube
[23:12] trav10668: DO YOU KNOW WHERE BABIES COME FROM?
[23:12] trav10668: nvm
[23:12] pippincrazy101: mature
[23:12] trav10668: you dont have to asnswer that
[23:12] pippincrazy101: your proving yourself very well
[23:12] trav10668: but seriously
[23:12] trav10668: yes
[23:12] trav10668: well im gunna go
[23:13] trav10668: herestravis
[23:13] pippincrazy101: okay
[23:13] pippincrazy101: thanks
[23:13] trav10668: call me
[23:13] pippincrazy101: not likely

wow, an 8th grade birthday party for jocks... i tell ya... it was... interesting... 30 kids! wow

i guess i should have realized taht stars would make me africa sick... oh well... tonight was a lot of fun... thank you

haha... the only person who made me laugh today after school was jenko... he came outside all upset because someone had told him i was crying because of his tie....

and i know people give him crap and stuff, but he actually is human under all his college degrees and big words and girlish screams

rarely have i EVER been this pissed.

EVER!

not even the time i broke my toothbrush throwing it at lena's head.


what the hell!? alright, so tell me what the crap it is that i f-ing did!!! cuz i sure as hell don't see it. you think i "leave them high and dry, like vinh"? well he had another girlfriend within a week!! yeah, i sure decimated him. and you know what, i asked you many MANY times what the hell it is that i did, and you always said you didn't wanna tell me, well, i think maybe it's time you told me just what it is i'm being accused of here. and furthermore, what the hell did you tell peter? i swear, i have never been this mad before, what's wrong with you? spreading rumors? hurting people? turning on your friends? it's dispicable.

aaaaaawwwwwwwwww.....................


............. darn



that makes me so sad!!!!!!!

well... i think i have shin splints again, and i dont know if going to after state is going to happen...

in other news... i loved our last run... the shot of anna, wow, that was like our entire year bottled up into one snare drum shot...

and the kids with the rubix cube... lol, that was fun, i don't know, i don't usually go up and talk to random people i don't know, but i guess rubix cubes make you feel like you have something in common, and so you are able to just simply talk to them out of the blue... it was fun, ha, i don't think i would recognize any of them again unless they still had their cube with them... i would recognize the cube... lol

and finals got canceled, so i'm glad we weren't there to get hyped up and then not get to reperform. they aren't rescheduling it.

i'm not going to lie... that hurt like nothing has ever hurt me before...

i thought it was going to be like old times, when i ment something, but in the end, well, apparently i don't, and even though we had fun, it wasn't the same...

and i'm sorry taht i wasn't crying for you seniors at the very end of the night, that was part of it, but the bigger part was the pain going through my heart...


thanks drew, i won't move to africa unless i can get you a plane ticket to come visit me...




gahhhh, i wanna just say, FORGET YOU! and have it over with, but that's not how it works, everything i wrote to you was true, and i can't just forget that, even though it brings tears and headaches...

i think....


that state brings out the most contradictory emotions humans have to express...

at one point everyone is pumped and excited, but then next minute the reality that the seniors are almost done hits them and there are tears.

then there's the excitement about having time for school... but at the same time, the lack of no time makes people feel bored, and unproductive.

thinking about the show we get to perform makes everyone very serious, and contemplative, however, at times, durning running block and such, the fact that the season is almost over makes everyone giddy with energy, and we end up with waves that go both forward and backward through the block.

people run around the bandroom vowing to give everyone in the band a hug, but at the same time, it's like everyone is celebrating a party, with tears....


i love the feelings and the love everyone feels during finals week, but under all that you know it's just the beginning of the end, and it's like... death, almost...



anyway, i'll close with, i love every single person in our band, and as long as tomorrow we have major fun, so that we can majorly sob, we will be winners, and champions, with no time for losers... so there!

it's almost good enough to write up and put in a story book... but not one for little kids, they wouldn't understand the confusion and the hurt that goes along with it.

how can one person be saying two completely different things? oops, sorry, three?! one being, of course, "forget the present just work towards africa because that all that really matters right now"

and the two fighting bits of me... i think i might spontaneously combust because of it all...

maybe that third part of me is right, i should just forget the present and live only for moving back to Africa...


wow, who'd have thought last year at this time that the only place i really wanted to be would be africa, i think i would have laughed at them, and explain, "no, i want to live in alaska, and i'm only going to visit africa this summer." but now? it's so... it was so real while i was there, but all i could think about was being homesick, but now? i've been africa sick since june...
i saw that sunset at the homecoming game, and it made me cry because i missed seeing something like that everynight...

i feel like... chirstian bales character in the Prestige.... different people inside of me, living one life... however, i might be more like Hugh Jackman's character, having to attempt a murder to be myself... mutliple me's running around...


GOLLUM!!!!! that's who i am!!!!! smeagol remembers a time when i didn't have problems, and gollum is pulling me toward the future, but maybe i'm blinded by something, like the ring of power...

why do i not know?! how can i not know?! africa...


south africa, okay, just watch it, it's coming closer every minute, however hard the minutes are... it's like a magic eye thing, just look through it, and somehow, between reality, and the futur there will be a picture of life, and direction.

well... i'm very dissapointed.... i hate it when you look forward to something, and then it isn't there in the end... oh well, we still had fun!